Ok, to start this week’s GMOT, I must start with business, then we’ll move onto the fun.
Kinda like a mullet… Business in the front and party in… ok you get it.
We need to address our relationship with our bar, Jovita’s. Many of you have had concerns about the service taking too long, waiting too long for drinks, checks, etc.. As much as that part is out of our hands, we can all do a little to help them out.
The bottom line is that Jovita’s lets us play Flip Cup. Other bars ban the game as it causes too much commotion (us, making commotion? No..), and a big mess left for the staff. There are a lot of us out there and by bringing cash you can help speed up the process of getting food and drinks. Also, please either order at the bar or from your server on the patio, but not both.
To clear up any confusion over what the specials are:
Ok, that’s all I have to say about that. Let’s keep this relationship we have with Jovita’s strong!! Remember… Flip Cup! Specials! Fun!
Now onto the GOOD STUFF!!…
Good games last week everyone…Everything is going swimmingly and glad to see smiles on everyones faces…and on some of yall, some serious wasted faces. Quite classic actually. I don’t really have any serious issues to address, but would like to say that if you are not playing in a game (not saying names) then please do not interfere with the game physically or verbally (too much)…thats all I am saying.
We now have a new section of the GMOT called “Power Polls” which is a ranking system of teams in the league done by a “black society.” It is based off runs scored, runs against, amount of shit talked to other teams (then lose), and bar participation. These are about as accurate as the BCS rankings, so deal with them. If you aren’t happy with your ranking, you are doing one of the above ranking criteria incorrectly.
Hope yall have a good week and take care.
Flip Cup Peoples,
Thank you once again for a great turn out at the bar. I think we are getting into the groove this season and realizing that drink specials and flip cup is pretty much the most amazing part of the week. I thank you for your enthusiasm, participation and patience. Thank you also to my lovely assistant Lacy for getting things kicked off. To echo the email that went out earlier this week, please be respectful of the bar and the bartenders/servers. Flip cup is not something that most bars will let us do, and our set up at jovita’s is pretty sweet. I know that service can sometimes be a little slow, but let’s keep in mind that for the most part, they are pretty great with us and we don’t want to mess that up.
Okay, here are the stats:
Sweat’n Balls v. Balls Towards the Wall: Balls Toward the Wall sweeps it.
SugarLumps v. El Chupacabre: Wow, SugarLumps takes it. I missed this match-up, but I am impressed. El Chu… Time to rally for next week!!
Sex and The City v. Red Rockets: Red Rockets pulls it out (which sounds just wrong)
WAKAShame/Bunt Pirates v. YLLINAD: Bunt Pirates with another victory. They have Jesus on their team and it is Lent so what do we really expect?
Relax and Let it Happen v. Freebasers: Relax wins on a forfeit. Freebasers, do we need to have an intervention? Get it to the bar.
Walk of Shame v. Kids in Rehab: Walk of Shame takes it. KIR, great to see you all out. Good showing.
Cereal Killers v. FUPA: Cereal Killers nabs this one. It was for our girlie Leah who will be missing for the rest of the season. Tear.
Balls Deep v. Dunder ResERECTION: Dunder wins it. They also beat up on Relax and the only MVP that I will mention this week is Rachelle because between her and Elicious, this team is a favorite on the tables.
Thanks again guys and let’s get fired up for next week. There is nothing better than warm weather and flip cup!
Wow and wow. I could not be any more impressed with all of you. We showed up with 50 jello shots (which were even not made correctly and pretty slimy), in the hopes of raising $40. That $40 goes to purchase shoes for 2 under privileged kids here in Austin. Not only did we sell out of shots before the end of the second games, but you all still donated just out of your own kindness. With your help, we made almost $60, to help 3 kids!!! That is awesome for the first week and I am incredibly grateful. I spoke with Shoes for Austin to let them know and they were ecstatic.
So, riding high on that success, we are going to stick with the program and do jello shots again. There is just something about sunshine, kickball and laced jello that works so well together. We are going to make double the shots to ensure that everyone can get nice and tipsy before your games. For this week’s goal, let’s see if we can hit $60. I know that times are tough, but any little bit that you can spare really makes a difference to these kids.
Thanks again for your spirit and generosity!!
PS… I promise I will get the recipe right this time….
This week was a really tough decision…
Although Freebaser STILL have yet to show to Jovita’s (see ‘Freebasers’ below for excuse), they actually turned in a writeup to me and apparently read this thing…So I will cut them some slack this week.
Sugarlumps held their own during a great game against Chupacabra…and yes, beat us at flip cup. However, they didn’t turn in a writeup!! Soo? Freebasers didn’t even show to the bar, you say? And many teams didn’t turn in write ups! Well, Sugarlumps, where else would I be able to put this fantastic video??
Now, on to the scores…
…and the current rankings…
…last but not least…drumroll please…
They’re back… That’s right, the Polls have returned with some actual data from two weeks of games. This season, we’re doing things a bit differently. We have a committee of folks ranking the teams each week and providing their commentary. The average ranking is your spot in the polls. Committee members take into account record, run differential, personal biases, overall attractiveness of the team; in short, ANYTHING can move your ranking up or down. Don’t like your spot? Win more, drink more, wear more revealing clothing and you should see your ranking rise. To kick things off, we have start with the defending champions. Which one? I’m glad you asked.
1. Relax and Let it Happen. “Shutouts are good, right?” “Their reign of terror can only last so long…or at least till the roids wear off.”
2. Balls Toward the Wall. (Same ranking as the next team, but they had fewer lower scores) “They will need to prove themselves against a worthy opponent.” “They don’t make enough commotion.”
3. WAKA Shame. “This is a seasoned squad with a skilled set of females (including Ryan.)” “[Unoriginal and posing] Shame – enough said.”
4. Red Rockets. “Watch out for this team… bunch of young athletes with talent.” “I do appreciate their team name referencing a canine penis though.”
5. Cereal Killers. “What? Really? NO WAY!!! I’m SO proud.” “Trying for greatest single season turnaround since Tampa Bay Rays.”
6. Freebasers. “Give them a couple weeks and they could be a problem for many teams.” “Trying to tap in and channel their inner Devon.”
7. Walk of Shame. “Got called out in the GMOT and responded.” “Solid defense until Andre loses his mind and starts throwing the ball all over the field like a madman.”
8. El Chupacabra. “Lost to a powerhouse and fought a good battle to victory.” “Dream match up… Chupa’s vs. FUPAs… doesn’t that just sound cool?” [April 9th.]
9. Dunder ResERECTION. “With the leadership of their first base woman, they have a chance.” “Is it just me, or does this team seem to win every game Rachelle ISN’T there?”
10. Sweat n’ Balls. “I won’t say sleeper here but I think [passed] out is a good term.” “They pulled off one W the first week, talked too much the second.”
11. Sugarlumps. “Could turn it around, we will see…” “Lost 2-0 to the other defending champs, then lost by one to Chupa. Jury’s still out.”
12. Kids in Rehab. “Polarizing team, ranked as high as 5th, as low as 16th.” “They have only scored four runs. I guess one time for each time they won the Cup, but c’mon…”
13. Balls Deep. “If they can get some points on the board they may get a W.” “0-2 with a pair of one-run losses, ouch. Defending Live runners up though, they’ll bounce back.”
14. FUPAs. “Pretty good for an old team.” “Give them time, Lisa and Wendell will prevail.”
15. Sex and the City. “The ladies are getting it together and will at least stay good looking.” “I’m not betting against Erika, she’s a badass.”
16. You Look Like I need a Drink. “They have had a tough schedule with two big time opponents. Potential to be a good team.” “Schedule is all downhill from here. That was a tough draw to start the season.”
Relax and Let It Happen
Here is what I have learned in now my third season playing in WAKA: anyone wearing soccer shoes is a threat at the plate. Make no mistake about it, this is an absolute truth. Well, the Freebasers had no shortage of soccer shoes and/or apparel so we knew going in that we would have a game on our hands. Justin and Hunter did an outstanding job of setting the table and getting us on the board first. They are probably the two most valuable players in the league to this point. Also, Renee continues to outdo herself with her solo performances during her at-bats.
However, where Relax made it happen last night was on the base paths. Justin has put the absolute fear of God into the players around the league with his baserunning so by merely chopping his feet behind the first basemen he brought in a run (What would you even call that stat? A run terrified in?). Also Chris, who leads the nation in underhanded baserunning moves, seized the opportunity to steal us a run and provide a cushion by capitalizing on an ever-so-brief loss of focus by the Freebasers second basewoman. Punk or be punked. By the time we tacked on another run courtesy of a soaring, majestic sacrifice fly by Big Stacy, we had all the assurance we needed behind a stellar effort by our oft-hammered pitcher. B-WALK!!! did a great job in the outfield and Loso continued to exist inside her own little Loso-sphere and get her freak on in the outfield to the boombox much to the delight of the bench players.
Jovita’s was a bit more subdued than last week… First off, our flip cup dream team was not intact, but more disappointing was that our opponents were a no-show. So we took the forfeit for an official victory then were promptly taught lessons in exhibition play from what I hear. No excuses, play like a champion!
WAKA Shame Bunt Pirates
WAKA Shame (or Bunt Pirates, I don’t even know our team name anymore) had a stellar night of offense and defense for the team’s second win of the season. Offense was started off by a sweet left field kick by Justin and followed up by great kicking by the rest of the lineup, including Matt (aka Jesus). Defense was headed up by Rock as well as multiple catches from the femine fatales duo of Carrie “Sticky Hands” Walton and Nicole “I’VE HAD THREE TEXAS MARTINIS AND A BEER!” Cooper as well as the other two Karries. At the bar, Danielle headed up flip cup where the team went 1 and 1. All in all, a fantastic night of kickball. Thanks to everyone that ref-ed!
So this week I was at the game, almost on time. No thanks to the team, opting to start without me. Seriously y’all, I missed half an inning. But whatever, in the write up last week I said I’d make things up this week, and so I shall.
The first inning started with a bang. Literally, someone started shooting at us. A rival kickball gang didn’t like our team colors and some of our more hardcore members throwing gang signs (looking at you, Jennifers.) We took the lead after one kick, but then Wendell channeled his spirit from Vegas and kicked a homerun to right. He wasn’t there in body and hip replacement, but he was there in spirit.
We had a big 3rd inning, fueled by amphetamines and steroids. We scored, let’s see, three, add the denominator, divide by pi, cube it to the power of the quadratic formula… six runs. Josh drove in a bunch, he’s so dreamy. In the bottom of the inning we committed 17 errors and gave back four runs in the span of one kicker. Not entirely sure how that happened, and I’m aware that doesn’t make sense. But we escaped, added a run late thanks to a UFO abducting the other team’s outfield and voila, 8-6 final.
Great game from the FUP (note: they weren’t a complete team, so they don’t get a complete name) when their Captains were in Vegas gambling on jai alai games in Nepal and Darin was off in Thailand paying children to spank him with bamboo canes. We’ve now scored more runs than Tourettes did all of last season. It’s f@#$%ing on!
Kids in Rehab
Friendly Rivalry – Walk’s turn to take Kids down
That was a close game last night, we just ran out of innings!
The Kids had a slow start. It was like we drank too much whiskey the night before. We’re still adjusting to the new ways of Live and met up with our old buddies, Walk of Shame. They had a great start leading them to victory.
Lisa, Minnie, Kim, Zach all had great kicks, which got them on base. Robert scored a run while Kim ran a decoy as their SS was confused and tried to get her out a 2nd time in the same inning. Dube also ran the bases and
scored on a great RKI by Jeff. Jeff was so excited he ran through 2nd base into center field!
WOS definitely found some holes in our defense last night, but Robert, Carrie, Jeff, and a diving Will all made great plays in the field. Another close game brings the all time series to 2 – 2. We hope to see you guys in Week 8 for a rematch and to break this series tie!!!
Rice Patty & Beignet
First and foremost, The Freebasers would like address the slanderous comments directed at us in last week’s GMOT. We do apologize for not shot-gunning a beer then smashing the can on our heads before each kick. We were under the impression–seeing as we are not 17 years old–we no longer needed to flaunt our debauchery to gain acceptance into the kickball culture (Not to mention the 5-0 was creepin’!). Secondly, we decided to forgo the post-game activities at Jovita’s to enjoy all that Freddie’s Place, right next door, has to offer. These perks include the wonderful game of Washers, $0.25 organic dog treats, and the ability to just be ourselves without feeling pressured into binge drinking on a “school night”. As for this week’s game…we simply didn’t come to play. There were some bad calls that didn’t go our way, but that’s no excuse. We left our “A” game at home with our tin foil and straws. But you can bet we’ll have our revenge. “O’Doyle, I’ve got a feeling your whole family’s going down…but for now I’ve got to study.” Who got the lighta’!
Walk of Shame
Yankees-Red Sox. Cowboys-Redskins. Michigan-Ohio State. Walk of Shame-Kids in Rehab. The fourth installment of the greatest rivalry in kickball got underway last week as the Walks took clashed with their pesky, but friendly rivals, Rehab. The Walks had lockdown defense for most of the game but in the last inning had a slight collapse and almost won the game. The game was awesome. Just like the playoffs last year when Rehab beat us, the final score was 3-2. The game wasn’t without some bloodshed though. If you guys see Carrie talking funny this week, thats not laryngitis. Thats the product of a karate chop to the throat. Kris “The Lady Killer” Lee is responsible for this. It turns out he really wanted to get the first base, no matter what, even at the expense of her voicebox. Tragic. There is no footage of the incident, but for a pretty good idea of what happened look here.
Ouch. Anyway, we are definitely glad she’s ok. And thank you for not beating the hell out of Kris after hurting you, we really wouldn’t know whether to laugh at him or pull you off of him.
MVP of the game… Chris S. Somehow life does not imitate sport. You didn’t play like the @#$% up that we all know you really are.
Welcome to the Walks, Ethan. Beer is on you next week.
And last thing, Walk of Shame is the most dominant flip cup entity ever assembled. Now you guys know why we don’t show up much. We aren’t in the business of embarrassing you other peons who simply cannot beat us in flip cup. Total domination this week. As a matter of fact, Walk of Shame does flip cup on a challenge basis only now. If you feel you can beat us, let me know. It’ll cost you. 😉
A 4-3 win for Dunder against a great team. Balls Deep was a fun team, with an awesome infield and man can they kick! Despite lots of new blood, Dunder held up some old traditions.
TRADITION #1: Where the fuck is everybody?! In true Dunder form, we had a solid 50% attendance rate. Luckily, Matt stepped up as our own personal Patches O’Houlihan and whipped us into shape.
TRADITION #2: Sausage party! Only two Dunder women in attendance (E’Lois and Kristen, two of our finest, or at least loudest). Luckily we pulled the mercenary DREA in to sub, so we didn’t have to take the out in out lineup. And boy did that pay off!
TRADITION #3: Defense! After allowing a 1st inning 2 run slam that I swear left a contrail behind it, we locked it down. Drea and Tim covered short perfectly, and Ben rocked 2nd (nailing a couple of overruns like a hitman). Rookie Jonathan now owns left field, bought and paid for with 6? catches, maybe more.
TRADITION #4: Drama! The “Dunder 5th Inning Flop” was in full effect. Up by two runs in the bottom of the 5th, a couple of fumbles loaded the bases. A questionable call on Tim’s catch (how does it hit the ground if his arms are under it?) cut our lead to one with bases loaded. Luckily Ryan’s catch kept the wheels on the bus and earned us the W.
But we broke from tradition in our offense! Too many doubles and RBIs to mention everyone, but we kicked the shit out of that ball! I think we went through our lineup three times. I gotta say, this looks like a good team. Imagine what might happen if more than 9 people came?
It was simple for this game. Our motivation? We could NOT allow ourselves a loss from a team called “Sugar Lumps.” Oh yeah, and Dos (the player formally known as Drew#2) wasn’t on “prescription” drugs this time. With Sarah out getting tattooed we subbed in Danielle for her first game of three that night. Impressive! Our no bunting game treated us well as our defense managed to catch many of the outfield flies. We came across a discrepancy during about the 3rd inning where the outs were somehow unclear. Thus we threw Drewzilla (not to be confused with Dos) up to bat. He got out. Ryan: “Well I don’t know about anyone else, but I feel better.” Thanks to Drewzilla for clearing that up! Sugarlumps has a damn good girl that allowed them to catch up and tie the score at 3’s. That’s when all-the-way-Adam called a homer, did just that, and solidified our win!!
I don’t want to discuss our flip cup game–call it beginner’s luck ‘Lumps–but let it be known, that we have heart. Our own Amanda, frantic and determined to grab more beer for the games, lept about the crowd, hands full, climbing on top of chairs as a shortcut, until… &*^!&@#%&^. Her foot went through a plastic chair. Illegidly everyone noticed BUT our team.. She pulled her leg out slammed down the beers and won that next flip cup game. That’s heart. Oh yeah, and her leg looks like it had a date with a shredder.
This week: we take on Relax… and I’ll leave you with this.
(I don’t know where in the hell this came from, but I’m not asking questions!!)
Translation: “El Chupacabra… He eats the goats and the children because he is el chupacabra.. people dont like him because he eats them and then kills them… and he made a movie he went to LA where he ate some more and killed some chickens and smoked some weed !! Chupacabra chu chu chu CHUPACABRA!!!!!!!”
You Look Like I Need A Drink
Dudes & Dudettes of Kickball Land:
I’m writing about a game that I wasn’t at and a flip cup game that I’m glad I didn’t see. Thus, I say to you: “We are starting out really bad.” Like Corky Romano bad. Bette Midler in a XXX scene, bad. Donald Trump making out with his hot daughter, bad. You get the point yet??
Apparently we lost to Waka Shame 8-1. If you are an immature 12 yr old inside like I am, you might laugh at that score. Then again, you might not. I did. And I rule. The highlights, as penned to me through gchat whilst wasting time at work include, but are not limited to:
o Some kind of bounce over Rich’s head that was not great for our team.
o An excellent “beam” on third base.
o A “go ahead” run that should have been a go ahead and stop.
o Some crazy amount of bunting that has now become a top priority on my hate list.
o Us losing, sulking, and then not getting to play flip cup as soon as we’d like to have (read: bitching about it until we got to).
A note to our future competition: We might not have a great record. We might not have a long laundry list of useful characteristics, which could include: talent, skills, brains, looks, or humor. But we do have the ability to show up. And I’m blown away by your ability to shown up. Or something like that, right Jerry Mcguire?? I don’t know… We’re not doing great but I promise a turn around. And no more bunts, sorry. I hate them.
Props to Waka Shame for a good win. Let’s keep it sporty.
-Adieu, with love…
Photo of the week…
This week we’ve got a tie… For some kickball isn’t complete without childhood items like…