Good day everyone! Hopefully you all made it out of last week with less bruises, pulled muscles and general full body pain than myself. The rain made for some interesting games, great wipe outs, and most of all, some upsets. There is only one undefeated team left in the league, Relax and Let it Happen, whom seem to be the favorite to hate, but sometimes love at the same time. Hopefully my team can end their reign of terror, but history doesn’t make that look too promising. We may have to pull a Nancy Kerrigan on them to get the “W”.
I would like to thank everyone as well for helping with the charity by slurping down some of those jello shots. The league ladies work hard to make those (well as hard as they can be to make) and just think, you are helping out underprivileged kids by taking shots… life could be worse.
Hope yall have had a hell of a week and are ready to get back on the fields Thursday. The Power Polls are back, and as biased as ever…if you don’t like your ranking, step it up…
— Pres. Logue
You people are seriously the best. We beat our fundraising goal for this week by $21 dollars which means that on Thursday alone, we bought shoes for 4 underprivileged kids here in Austin. Many of you were asking about the charity that we chose so I will discuss it again.
We chose this organization because it incorporates both kids and sports and is also locally based. Plus, we will be able to directly see how our money is being put to work. As I have mentioned, $20 buys a brand new pair of New Balance sneakers for kids here locally who meet certain academic and physical fitness goals. So far we have been able to help 7 kids and Shoes for Austin will ensure that we either get to meet this kids, or that we get notes from them so that we know who we are helping. Seriously, every dollar helps and I am so grateful for how all of you have come together to support our charity.
We are going to stick with jello shots as they have been successful. Plus, Lacy and I found a website that has about 400 different recipes and we are excited to test them all out!! Please bring some dollar bills if you can. I will be at the fields around 6:30.
Thanks again, a million times over, and see you on Thursday!!
Flip Cup Junkies,
Way to go on another awesome showing. As I had the late game this week, I enlisted my two celebrity flip cup refs, Lacy and Elois to take the reigns. With that, I pass the column on to Elois:
Wazzzzzzzz uuuuuuppppp Peeps!!! E-Licious D-Licious aka Elois here for your guest writer this week. I do want to start of by saying how much fun it was to ref some of the Flip-Cup games!! Thank you all for allowing me to use my loudness for something useful! This is my third season for kickball and I must say kudos to Jovita’s! They have been extremely cool with our rowdy bunch thus far. The drink specials are great and the flip cup games this season are simply awesome!! Everyone is looking forward to the flip cup games and the bar as much or more than the actual kickball games which I think is always a plus. Danielle and Lacy thanks again for the fun night! I had a blast!
Now onto the important things. Okay, here are this week’s stats:
Relax v. Sugar Lumps: Lumps take this round!
Red Rockets v. Balls Deep: Here’s to the Red Rockets for a win. This makes Balls Deep 2 losses in a row, Come on guys!!
Sweat’n Balls v. Dunder ResERECTION: Ok, so Dunder took you guys on the field but blew a 2-0 start by losing the last 3 rounds in a row for Sweat’n to get a come from behind victory at the flip cup tables. Sweat’n just handed Dunder their first Flip cup defeat of the season. Hats off to you guys for a fun night of kickball and flip cup!
El Chupacabra v. You Look Like I Need a Drink: This one came down to an extra round tied at 2 each… the last round was too close to call so it went into extra flips. El Chupacabra took the win in this nail biter!!
Cereal Killers v. Kids in Rehab: Cereal Killers took this one.
Sex and the City v. Walk of Shame: After making sure the name was correct on the board Walk OF Shame still lost this one to Sex and the City. But hey, at least we got the name right!!
Great week everyone, looking forward to seeing you all at the tables this week!!!
Onto the field games,
Standings as of Week 4:
Five undefeated teams entered last week, one exited. Who’s going to knock Relax off their pedestal? Who’s going to be Sex and the City’s 1st victim? Stay tuned..
- Relax and Let it Happen. “Obvious pick for number 1” “Scoreboard.”
- Freebasers. “A team that no one wants to play. Kinda like Relax” “They beat a bunch of veterans, respect.”
- Walk of Shame. “Looking forward to them settling with WAKA Shame.” “Undefeated with a full team.”
- WAKA Shame. “I see this team making a run for silver.” “Thought they could just step onto the field and win. Oops.”
- Red Rockets. “I love dog dic… I mean, this team looks promising to compete.” “Definitely talented, but getting punked by a winless team?”
- Kids in Rehab. “If Minnie and Dube weren’t so hot, they’d be #10.” “They’re now 83-0 following a loss.”
- Cereal Killers. “Slipping and sliding all over the place like a baby giraffe on ice.” “If nothing else, they are very entertaining to watch.”
- Dunder ResERECTION. “I love boner references.” “I want to see them beat a winning team.”
- Balls Toward the Wall. “Looking for Jonah and Josh to step it up.” “Another 2-0 that lost to an 0-2. Hmmm…”
- FUPA’s. “Wendell and Lisa may be the coolest people in the league.” “That W might have been the one to get them rolling.”
- El Chupacabra. “They may turn out to be a surprise in the playoffs. As long as they don’t drink.” “They can’t even drink beer. You should be the weakest link.”
- Balls Deep. “Need more deep balls.” “This could be the sleeper team. Lets just hope they don’t fall asleep.”
- Sugar Lumps. “They get credit for scoring on Relax and putting up with their shit.” “Playing the toughest schedule in the league so far.”
- Sweat and Balls. “Loud. Really loud. Wait, that’s only the Captain.” “Kept it close this week. Baby steps.”
- You Look Like I need a Drink. “Their Captain has to be right one of these times.” “Momentum from winning a chug off? Weirder things have happened.”
- Sex and the City. “Still good looking.” “They are going to catch some team napping and beat them HARD.”
Relax & Let It Happen
Jay’s scoreless innings streak was finally brought to a screeching halt during a furious one run rally by our opponents in the bottom of the fifth inning. Much of the blame was attributed directly to Justin, however, we got scored on as a team. Aside from that most unfortunate occurrence of actually allowing the other team to feel a sense of accomplishment, we thoroughly dominated the game from start to finish. We were a bit shorthanded with various injuries, vacations and come to Jesus dinners but we managed to field a lineup anyways. Sadly, we were also missing the music that has become our soundtrack in WAKA play as we had extension cord issues(we don’t have one that is 200 feet long).
Jovita’s was another humbling lesson as we were annihilated swiftly and efficiently. Again there was a lot of finger-pointing going on after the loss but we are no longer amongst the ranks of the unbeaten in flip cup. Luckily there is a long season ahead to redeem ourselves. I cannot talk much as my flip cup capabilities are like Shaq at the free throw line, just a total and complete train-wreck-mess. Hopefully we can bring a full team to the fields this week and carry on our undefeated kickball season.
Balls Toward the Wall
Make the hurting stop – B2W – 4-3 (Losers’ Circle)
You: charming nursing home escapees with superior fashion sense and calf strength. Us: over-confident previously undefeated’s trying to figure out what qualifies as a FUPA. Was that mud on your pants, or were we just really sorry to play you?
Can’t explain how good it felt to catch your line drive between our legs. You played hard to get [out], we tried to get to 3rd base too early and often. Loved guessing where your waistline ended and the fun began, but we just couldn’t get our balls deep enough.
Thanks for the lesson in humility. You’re wise beyond – or probably around – your age.
*Location: Our Last Hoorah
It’s OK to contact this poster via Morse code with services or other commercial interests, so long as they pertain to the unlimited possibilities that a Sham-Wow/OxyClean combination provides.
To[ward] the window…
WAKA Shame Bunt Pirates
I am really not sure what to say. My team should be ashamed of themselves…We played awful and no one came out to the bar…I was most upset about no one coming to the bar and soaking in tears and beers in sorrow. SO, this is my first official warning to everyone on my team; if you do not show up to the game mentally, you are hereby required to show up to the bar and by me a drink or three. Other than all that, we did great. Team, I love yall, now lets get this shit together and beat the crap out of Relax. See yall at 8.
Kids in Rehab
After 2 weeks off, Kids In Rehab came back and it feels so good. MVP goes to Zach for kicking a deep one into right center. He wouldn’t have scored if Derek hadn’t slipped in the mud trying to get to second base. It was muddy and slick but KIR managed to turn it on offensively with 7 runs. Kudos to Lisa for the RKI to get Dube home and to the other 6: Minnie, Kim, Derek, Jon, Zach and Will. Fielding was a little tricky with all the mud slides, but our defense prevailed and held them to only a few runs. Regardless, we don’t give any birthday mercy, even if Cameron shared his keg of Mirrer Rite. Thanks & I hope your first “L” of the season counts for a birthday spanking.
After a three-week hiatus from rain outs and hipsters taking over our city for south-by, The Freebasers were back in effect this week. We quickly rubbed the rust off our straws and got down and dirty. Literally. It was freakin’ muddy out there. WAKA Shame did a good job capitalizing off some of our early muddy mistakes, but in the end they were no match for BPs speed and some clutch city plays by our beautiful ladies. However the highlight of the night came after the buzzer had sounded, when Alex’s dog Lily laid out Desha’s dog Blue like Michael Huff knockin out Matt Leinart*. It was one of those painfully hilarious moments to watch. You know what I’m talking about. Who got the lighta’!
*No dogs were harmed during the writing of this post or during said events it depicts.
Walk OF Shame
After we gathered ourselves from the unbelievable chugoff (seriously, like a car wreck).. we had a good turn out at the bar and finished the night undefeated in (too many games to count of) flipcup. Domination. Redemption. Serious inebriation. Wish I could elaborate more, Grant. It was a cloudy slaughter… all I can say is Ashley is by far the best drinker on your team.
Up next… Chupa takes on Kids in Rehab! (We don’t believe in rehab..)
You Look Like I Need A Drink
Hopefully the girls with fans and grapes didn’t distract you last week, because our GOLDEN GODDESS, Ashlee was in rare form. Ashlee has stepped up to be quite the pitcher but this would prove to be just the beginning of her ass-kicked-ness.
YLLINAD found ourselves in a familiar position when we were down 1-0 for the majority of the game. Props to Chupacabra for being down with the no bunting philosophy. I know you guys out there love to give the ball just a slight kiss and then gingerly run to your base, but both teams were down to step up and smack that red ball like it was me and my stepdad (you’ll get the allusion when you meet me).
Our center field took a pounding early on and gave up the run. I think Everyone did well to keep us in the game. Before we know it, its the bottom of the 5th and thanks to yours truly for DOMINATING Lacy in the pre-game scissors match, we have the last at bat (kick?) We got a few on base but “Chupa” was putting the hurt on us and we found ourselves with two on base and two outs, still losing. I quickly performed a group prayer to the kickball gods, complete with sips of Budlight and they smiled upon my right foot and we got the tying run. One out later we were tied, game over.
THIS IS WHERE OUR GODDESS CAME TO US and rescued us from the depths. Ashlee decided to take on a chug off and represent us. Halfway in the race seems even… a normal fight… And then… AND THEN…. Ashlee kills it. Puts up her cup. She’s done. We win (officially or unofficially, doesn’t matter).
Props to both teams.. We had a great time. Don’t want to talk about flip cup, but I’m sure Lacy will fill you in on the details… ugh…
Short and sweet this week. I’ll be honest, I don’t remember much from Thursday night. I know we lost 7-3. That makes 37 consecutive times we’ve lost to Rehab. We were missing some players. Daniel had one of the coolest slide/dodge/mud/fall things I’ve ever seen. Then he kept feeding me tequila shots. I still haven’t gotten all the mud off. For everyone who showed up, my team and others, thanks for drinking my alcohol and celebrating my birthday early with me. If you did something really cool and I just forgot, I’m sorry.
As always, check out pictures on our Facebook page:
…And don’t forget to submit your own!